A successful business owner, brave at heart, high spirited, an excellent example of calm and composure, having the greatest pearls of wisdom, an exemplary mother and dedicated wife. She is the one who chose the chosen one. She is Hazrat Khadija RA. First wife of our Holy prophet Muhammad SAW.
If we go through her journey, where she started from; she was so perfect in every aspect. She was the woman of wisdom, most calm and a go to person for our Holy prophet SAW whenever required. She was the bravest one who always took charge. She was an empowered woman. She was the biggest business owner in Arab whose Karawans were greatest among all leaders of Makkah. But her destiny was written by Allah for some other purpose. Something great. Once, she was looking for someone to lead her karawan and then her sister Hala recommended Hazrat Muhammad SAW to her. He used to herd her flocks and was already famous in Makkah as Sadiq and Ameen. Hazrat Khadijah R.A. appointed our prophet for the task and sent her servant Maisara to accompany him. Later, the servant told her about Hazrat Muhammad SAW honesty and sincerity which made her realize to consider him as her life partner. Although Arab’s biggest businessmen and leaders approached her to marry including Abu Jahal, but she was courageous enough that she refused those proposals. She had the nerve of not getting into anyone’s influence. She had her own set criteria for her life partner. So she herself sent proposal to Hazrat Muhammad SAW.
This decision of her marriage has a very lesson for girls. To believe in your partner. To look for character over wealth. To check how a person treats others before marrying him. Marriage of Hazrat Khadijah and Hazrat Muhammad SAW is a clear example for our society. She was a widow, had children, elder than our Holy prophet SAW yet he accepted the proposal and not only accepted but also moved to her home. What a beautiful relationship they had. This relationship was beyond being good spouses but they had a higher purpose of their lives. Their connection was also a crucial part of that purpose.
She supported our prophet SAW when he had nothing. She had her own aspirations in her life. She was so self secured yet down to earth.
How beautiful it is that a woman who is the owner of biggest business Karawans and lived her whole life in luxuries yet taking food for her husband herself to Cave of Hira. And not only this, she took care of home and children as well when Hazrat Muhammad SAW spent his days and nights in Cave of Hira. She never complained. Never argued. Stood firm beside him always. Even when the first revelation happened, when Angel Jibrael appeared in Cave of Hira and asked Hazrat Muhammad SAW to Read (IQRA) and then grabbed him tightly in his wings, our holy prophet felt like something engraved on his chest. And when he left cave of Hira, Hazrat Muhammad SAW witnessed him flying and his wings all over the sky. This made him so confused. He was so uncertain about all this, so unsure about himself. He ran from cave and the first person he reached to tell his condition was none other than Hazrat Khadija RA.
This shows the level of comfort and believe he got from her. And she calmed him that time as well. She gave him confidence to believe in himself. She ensured him that Allah will never do wrong with him because he was such a pious person who always care for others. This is why Hazrat Muhammad SAW said about her that “She believed in me when everyone denied.”
And only this, she used her wisdom and thought how to tackle the situation. She took Hazrat Muhammad SAW with her to her cousin Warqah bin Naufil who was a practicing Christian and was understanding Bible thoroughly that time. She naarated him whole scenario. He also endorsed that this is the same angel who came to Hazrat Esa A.S. He also warned them both that this all wouldn’t be easy. They will have to face severe consequences. But she accepted that challenge wholeheartedly. She stepped forward to support Hazrat Muhammad SAW no matter what happened.
The level of trust and confidence among them was par excellence. When Angel Jibrael taught Hazrat Muhammad SAW first time about the method of wudhu and salah, she was the first person whom Hazrat Muhammad SAW reached to. He taught her the process hence she was the first person on earth who learnt and did wudhu and namaz with Hazrat Muhammad SAW.
Even before revelation, when Hazrat Muhammad SAW was seeing Angel Jibrael and got scared of his appearance, he told this to Hazrat Khadija RA. And how mindfully she tackled the situation. She first asked Hazrat Muhammad SAW to sit beside her right side and asked him about Angel’s visibility, he said yes. Then she moved him to left and repeated the question, he again nodded positive. Finally she hugged him and loosen her hair to open. Angel Jibrael disappeaed. Upon asking and knowing he has left, she said to Hazrat Muhammad SAW that he surely was an angel . If he was a Jin,
He would never got disappeared . He did this because of embarrassment.
Level of trust and generosity among both the spouse was also an example. Once Hazrat Muhammad SAW was passing by a mountain, he saw some people there in miserable condition. He had no money with him to help them which made him sad. Upon returning home, when Hazrat Khadija RA inquired about his mood, he told her the whole reason. She listened to this and asked Hazrat Muhammad SAW to bring all the leaders of Makkah. He left without any question and till he returned, she gathered all the coins and jewelry and whatever she had at one place. It was all such a huge pile that Hazrat Muhammad SAW hid behind that wealth. She then addressed to all leaders and said “This is all belong to Muhammad now. He has all the rights to spend this wealth as he wants.” She actually empowered our Prophet by doing this. This act showed her affection towards her husband Hazrat Muhammad SAW. She could have helped those needy people herself. But she chose to do this charity through Holy prophet Muhammad SAW. She was so compassionate about Hazrat Muhammad SAW that she knew he will never do unjust with anyone.
Preaching someone good deeds is also one of her act. She did that when she was well off and even when she had nothing. The incident on Shaib Abi Talib tells us about her this aspect. When all Muslims were boycotted and abandoned out of Makkah in a dessert. Even though throughout her life she received respect, she faced all negligence as well for Hazrat Muhammad SAW and for the right religion, Islam. She had everything. She could have chosen to stay back home and help Hazrat Muhammad SAW from there. But she chose to be with him in these tough times. She was the one nullifying hardships of our prophet Muhammad SAW. And her selflessness was even praised by Allah. Allah said about her that “He has made a castle of pearls for her in Jannah. Where there would be no chaos.” This was all because of her struggles throughout her life for Islam. And the way she reciprocated the conversation of Angel Jibrael was commendable. When Hazrat Muhammad SAW told her that angel Jibrael is here and says Salam to her from himself and from Allah, she replied Walaikum Salam to Jibrael and said that Allah himself is salamati (blessings). Such a wisdom and IQ level she had which is absolutely impressive.
Support matters when it is actually needed. Her presence in every step of preaching of Islam can never be forgotten. She was an exemplary wife who had higher purposes related to her spouse. She didn’t stuck herself in home and kitchen. But she always stood beside Hazrat Muhammad SAW.
If we compare our selves with her, we have created certain templates in our minds for a good wife. And we remain stuck in those. Amma Khadijah was the one who set an example of how a woman should be. She was the one who financed the first campaign of Islam. She broke all stereotypes. Her whole life journey is an example for us that what woman in Islam is. We have lost our visions and wandering for our rights. Rights that already have given by our religion decades ago.
Even after her death, Hazrat Muhammad SAW used to sent gifts to her relatives. And this was because she used to do the same with his relatives. Even once she gifted a flock of sheeps to Bibi Haleema who nursed Hazrat Muhammad SAW after his mother Bibi Amna. This act of hers had such a profound impact on our holy prophet Muhammad SAW. Even Hazrat Ayesha R.A used to say that Hazrat Muhammad SAW talked much about Amma Khadijah and he never forgot her throughout his life.